I saw Dr. West today.
Suffice it to say she was not nearly as happy or congratulatory as my other oncs have been.
She would really like me to do another round or two of chemo, get the CA-125 down below 10 (currently 30), and have a CT Scan which shows No Evidence of Disease (NED.) And then, maybe, after that, doing a PARP inhibitor, or maybe not. But she said the research shows that the best chance of staying in remission is, shockingly, to actually be in remission, which technically I’m not yet. And getting and staying in remission is her goal for me.
So now I’m contemplating another month or two of chemo. Ugh. And through the holidays. Ugh.
And I knew she would reprimand me for the fact I’ve fallen off the integrative wagon pretty good in the last six weeks or so, especially around my diet. And she did. I have some internal work to do around dealing with the sense of deprivation I feel on this restrictive diet. It is kind of sad, but I have a part that feels like, “If I can’t eat pizza then life is not worth living.” (Really?)
So anyway, thought I’d fill you in on the latest. I need to process it, and discuss it with the other oncs, too.
And I need a bath, and sleep. Badly.