The 8 Cs of IFS Therapy:
Calm Clear Compassionate Confident Connected Courageous Creative Curious
I have been taking tinctures sublingually, one a broad spectrum CBD dominant tincture, and the other a broad spectrum THC dominant tincture. I’m gradually working my way up on the dosage. I do THC at bedtime and I am definitely feeling the effects in terms of how easy (or not) it is to wake up in the morning. The goal, according to the person I consulted with, Joanna Matson, is to move from 5 mg/day up to 1 g/day, if possible. Not everyone can handle that much apparently, so I’m gradually seeing how much I can take in. Apparently, having 60 g of THC in the system is the level at which it is most anti-cancer.
I am also using a full spectrum cannabis salve, directly on my belly. It has all the terpenes still intact, so it definitely smells like marijuana. I’m coming around to appreciating both the smell and the taste. If it can help me get and maintain remission, I’m good with that.
Canna-Veda is one of my sources. This is Joanna Matson’s company. She was referred to me by my primary care physician Stacie Johns MD. Also, Joanna informed me that these other sites are good resources as well: Patients Out Of Time and Project CBD.
Tomorrow I will have an appointment with my own personal counselor to work on whatever emotional releasing my system is feeling like it needs to release. This is one of the nine things Radical Remission calls for in Chapter 5: Releasing Suppressed Emotions. One of the things that has been said to me and us recently is to go back 10-12 years from when symptoms first started and look at what was going on in my life at the time as that is likely the seed from which cancer grew. So that is probably where we will head tomorrow in session. It was a tumultuous time. My former marriage was feeling unsettled and uncomfortable, my mother had just died a year or two before, I was reevaluating career and changing course and re-training. There is a lot there in those two or three years.
Along with counseling, I am feeling the need to more deliberately and routinely take up a contemplative practice. I don’t think I said this yet, but I decided to buy myself a meditation sitting cushion. I went to a couple different places that I thought might have one, and ended up with a beautiful one, hand made in Vietnam, sold by Ten Thousand Villages. So now it is on me to really begin to implement a schedule of contemplation and meditation. That is also addressed in Radical Remission in Chapter 8: Deepening Your Spiritual Connection. And my step-sister Margie forwarded me a podcast of Patrick Dempsey (aka McDreamy) discussing his meditation practice and his organization supporting people with cancer. I haven’t listened to it yet, but I will soon.
I’ve been helping my partner Grant with some of his jobs lately. I do a little bit here and there as a light duty assistant. I do things that don’t require heavy lifting, while also being super careful to not injure or cut myself, as being low on various kinds of blood cells and platelets etc., makes healing an injury and fighting off infection a bit harder at the moment.
That being said it is fun and interesting to apply that part of my interest and education set in a more hands-on setting. The current project is a bathroom remodel, with quite a few jobs in the wings. I do some design work, light duty construction management, and light duty construction assisting.
The choice to move from construction and design into counseling was one of the things I was wrestling with mightily in the years when presumably the cancer seed was sown. So maybe interacting with my various parts about that choice will be one of the things we work on in counseling tomorrow.
I do love the Art of design. And I love the concreteness of seeing pre- and post- work. The finished product is so satisfying. The actual hands-on of doing the work is less in my realm of strength and interest. Grant is much better at that. But it is also something that was modeled for me growing up by my very handy Dad.
On the RIASEC scale though, I’m not R enough. I am IAS. Hands-on construction work is very, very R. Part of why I ended up choosing Counselor instead is because IAS is great for that. (Here is an online test if you want to see where you land.)
Other check ins I’ve had since I last wrote include:
- Remission Nutrition. I had a telesession with Jen Nolan about tweaking how I should be eating. She thinks I’m doing pretty well, but I told her it’s not so much that I don’t know how I should be eating, as that I have a young part that is so sick of only eating what is good for me, and is going a little bit ballistic about not having the opportunity to eat yummy things. She referred that all back to me as I’m the counselor. So maybe that will also be something I do in my own personal counseling session tomorrow: get in touch with the part that is sick of eating only things on this restricted diet. In any case, she definitely is in the camp of low-carb, moving towards keto. I told her keto is not really my friend. She said to allow three months (!!) to get used to it, and that she recommends weaning off of carbs gradually. Towards that end, she wants me to use the Cronometer app to keep track of what I’m actually eating so we can then plan accordingly. She will recommend which settings to start with and then I will begin. The fact that I’m an INFP makes that kind of routine record keeping annoying. Between the Supplements tracking and the Food tracking, I spend a lot of time tracking things. Ugh.
- Yoga Therapy. I had a consult with a yoga therapist Dr. West recommends. We would do sessions via teleconferencing. It sounds like it could be helpful, so I’ll try it. My first session will be this coming Thursday.
- Lymph Drainage, Massage and Essential Oils. I had another post-treatment session at LymphWorks, to help detox after treatment. CJ, the therapist, also informed me that now they have a PEMF machine with different protocols for different issues. I will likely take her up on trying that sometime as well.
This coming week will be pre-Canada, and the week off between treatments, so I should be able to live my life reasonably normally in this next week. I will continue to apply what I know towards making my life what I want it to be, what will be of best service, and what will be most healthy.